DSM-EHI.1 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Equine-Human Interaction Version 1 E Q U I M A N I A Equimania: A serious mental disorder in which occupation with equine and conjunctive /supportive feline, canine, and caprines interferes with the ordinary tasks of daily living and significantly interferes with normal human social interaction, An addictive component present such that patient congregates only with other equine-dependents and their aggregates. NO LESS THAN FOUR OF THE FOLLOWING SHALL BE PRESENT TO MAKE THIS DIAGNOSIS: 1. Noticeable deterioration of living quarters of human equine-dependent in conjunction with superior maintenance of living quarters of equines and their aggregates. 2. Grandiose component includes preoccupation with the extraordinariness of the patient's equine/s which flies in the face of reality. 3. Noticeable deterioration of the appearance of patient (personal grooming) in conjunction with horse grooming preoccupation. Potentially obsessive component. (Score 1-5 for level of obsessive component with 5 being most extreme) 4. Manic deploy of charge card privileges in tack and feed stores within a 120 mile radius of home. ... and far beyond ordinary means. Sprees often followed by periods of depression and worry. 5. Preoccupation with detail of hay prices, cutting seasons... and the prices of apples and carrots. 6. Neglect of personal health and dental care and scrupulous attention to veterinary care and teeth floating.. 7. Maintenance of a growing number of equines and their aggregates either by breeding or irresistable purchase or both. NOTE: Talking baby talk to 1100 pound animals is not considered a part of the mental dis-ease picture. TREATMENT: OBTAIN an endless supply of small oblong pieces of green paper. These are probably marked,:"In God We Trust" because only God can really help the Equimaniac. Apply liberally and watch them disappear.